Brown Does Everything For You (August 31, 2019)

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I spot a UPS truck and decide to start working for the company right then and there, trespassing and all. A supervisor pulls me over, but other than asking for some paperwork doesn't seem to care that some dude off the street has taken over their truck.

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On my second day, I'm sent to the house of a domestic violence victim and told not to leave after delivering. After some awkwardness, the victim does indeed end up going to the hospital...to give birth. Later, while on route, I scissor-cut two old ladies' hair in the middle of a field.

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On my third day, rather than the brown uniform, I arrive to work in a shirt and tie.

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It's Not Wrong If It's True (August 29, 2019)

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In a hospital corridor, after a talk with ex-pitcher David Wells about his book, my grandma revs up her wheelchair and shoots down the hall at high speed. She bursts through an open double-door and slams into a parked armored truck outside. I come charging down the hall behind her "What are you doing, you IDIOT?" I chastise. Some woman questions me calling my own grandma an idiot; my response: "What else do you call somebody who crashes their wheelchair into an armored truck?!"

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Meow-tta Here (August 26, 2019)

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Steve from Beverly Hills, 90210 is in some Disneyland-type competition. His task? To hold a large tray over his head. Sounds easy enough until you realize in each corner of the tray is a cylinder with a cat inside—when Steve holds the tray up, each cat bolts out through the ceiling. Sounds sensible to me.

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Once...Twice...Three TImes A Fanboy (August 25, 2019)

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After trying to intimidate some fresh-acting youths by unsuccessfully dangling them by their throats, I return to high school, where Lionel Richie is a teacher. I nervously ask him to autograph my Dancing On The Ceiling album and while he complies, he signs it to "Mr. and Mrs. Ellie". I share my true story of listening to "Dancing On The Ceiling" 14 times in a row one night. Richie doesn't seem to care.

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Who Exactly Hired Them For This Mission? (August 17, 2019)

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I'm a fumigator, that is, until I'm caught removing my shirt outside a customer's house.
Next, The A-Team is crazily congratulated by Burt Reynolds after completing their mission, which was throwing balls at kids and knocking them over like bowling pins.

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Wrong Sport, Boch (August 13, 2019)

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It's NBA Legends vs. Modern Stars in a playoff battle. Bucks star Giannis Antetokounmpo dishes to former Warrior Monta Ellis for the game winning J...brick. As they walk off the court, annoyed Stars fan George Karl (the ex-NBA coach) mutters to Stars coach Bruce Bochy: "You can get your receipt at the front", since Bochy just sat and watched like a fan rather than call a timeout.
After the game, more action goes down, including #23 LeBron James swatting #6 LeBron James, Michael Jordan winning his 7th championship, and the 76ers playing four games in one day.

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Wouldn't You Resist, Too? (August 10, 2019)

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As I take my mom to work, I attempt to throw a resisting cat in the car with us. Why is it resisting? Because the eyes of the stuffed flamingo in the back seat are moving, supposedly. So instead we use a too-small bike with a gym bag tied to it for "safety".

 

Finally, Cardinals quarterback Kyler Murray chases local radio host Damon Bruce onto the roof of some house.